Not everyone knows exactly what they’re looking for online. Sometimes they’ll input something unexpected on Google, and stumble upon a site by accident. Hey, it happens. The thing is though, some of the most popular sites out there have some really weird search terms (search data provided by Alexa.com). For example, just consider how people happened upon…
TopTenz has a soft spot for our friends over at Cracked. We’re both producers of lists that contain interesting facts. The only real difference is that our lists always have ten entries. Your move, Cracked!
Although it advertises itself as the biggest comedy site on the web, one of the main ways people find the website is by typing “get laid.” Now, I understand that the internet is all about instant gratification, but come on, seriously? If you’re really that desperate to do the horizontal hug, you can spare four seconds to type the words “how to” first.
Oh Wikipedia: simultaneously the source of all human knowledge, and almost all human ignorance, both at the same time. Kudos to you. Your easily editable articles are the bane of every teacher in existence but, as long as you keep putting those citations at the bottom, no student will ever leave you.
However, despite containing almost everything, ever, a considerable chunk of people find Wikipedia by searching “star trek original series”. Which is perfectly OK, but I wasn’t kidding when I said that Wikipedia has an article on almost everything. Why is Star Trek so special? What has Shatner got that the Whizzinator hasn’t?
Everyone reading this has Googled themselves. If you haven’t, you should. It’s really weird; all your old MySpace photos come up. It’s like being slapped in the face by the past.
So you can’t blame us for checking what TopTenz’ top search terms were. Now we’re quite proud that, right at the top, it says “top 10 lists.” Up yours, Listverse! But guys, “women’s clothing websites,” really? We thought we had street cred; why did you have to ruin that for us?
Twitter is second only to Facebook in terms of social media dominance. Not to mention that it’s the 10th most popular site on Earth, period. Just bear that in mind; it’s the 10th most popular site on the planet, and yet most people find it by searching “facebook,” “youtube,” and “hotmail”. That’s just sad; it’s like having your girlfriend call out her ex’s name in bed. No, scratch that, it’s like your girlfriend calling out the name of everyone but you in bed. Twitter just can’t catch a break.
6. Game FAQs
Game FAQs is the ultimate source for video game knowledge. If you’re stuck on any game, this is the place you check. So, as you’d expect, people find this site by searching for various games, one of which just so happens to be “digimon world 4”. This game is so decidedly average, even its Wikipedia page can cause the part of your jeans covered by your laptop to turn beige.
The only thing more embarrassing than owning this game, is being so bad at playing it you need to search the Internet for advice on how to beat it.
5. Huffington Post
The Huffington post gets a bum rap, which isn’t really fair, since it does provide up to date, factually correct, pretty well-researched news every single day. Plus, they post videos of cute animals all the time, which is cool.
Then again, most people find the site by searching “kate middleton topless” or “honey boo boo.” For comparisons sake, that’s almost the exact same way people find famous muckraking site, TMZ. Come on Huffpost, even Fox News just has “princess kate.” When the people who read Fox News are more subtle than you, you know you’ve failed horribly as a news source.
If you love unsourced trivia about movies, or writing overly long reviews of anime shows that no one cares about, IMDB is the site for you!
Considering the site contains information about almost every film ever made, you’d think people would find the site by searching for really good films. You’d think, anyway. Apparently a lot of people who find the site, found it by searching for both “magic mike” and “twilight,” both of which are films where people with no personality take their shirt off for no real reason.
Sure, “the dark knight” is on there too, but it’s only one place ahead of Twilight. There should never be a reason for Batman to be anywhere near Twilight, ever, unless somebody wants to write up the tale of Bruce Wayne beating the ever-loving crap out of both Jacob and Edward. Just a thought.
3. Fox News
And we’re not done making fun of Fox News yet, not when they give us so much wonderful material. One of the most popular search terms to find the site is “lindsay lohan.” When was the last time she was relevant in any way whatsoever? Unless she’s been hit by a car in the time it took to write this sentence, there is no reason she should be anywhere near the search terms for your site.
Plus, the fact people find Fox with the “apologizes,” Americanized spelling and all, irks the hell out of me.
2. Two Very, Very Naughty Sites
People have urges, which is perfectly natural, and the Internet is a place where you can always satisfy them with a simple click of the safe search filter. Now, there are two very popular sites where you can see naked people climb inside each other. Just try and guess what they are by the following search terms: “redtoube” and “youpon.” Subtle, right?
Spelling isn’t that important online, since Google will correct most small mistakes. But there’s just something really icky about how so many millions of people are searching these websites with one hand, that the misspellings are more common than the actual name of the website.
If you’re not sure what Incredibar is, don’t search for it. It’s a terrible, terrible search engine/toolbar that comes bundled with other software. It’s so universally reviled, that it’s not uncommon to see it put in the same boat as malware.
It’s so bad that, if you search the words “incredibar” in almost any search engine, the first result you’ll get is a guide on how to remove it. Most every result afterwards is also centered around getting rid of the damn thing. But here’s the really sad part: one of the most common search results for the actual main website is “how to uninstall.” Awwwwww, I almost want to install it now, just because I feel bad for the company. Almost.