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    Humor

    Top 10 Worst Named Cities in America

    TopTenzBy TopTenzSeptember 1, 2008Updated:February 1, 201971 Comments3 Mins Read
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    At the risk of never being given the keys to the city of Crapo, Maryland, where you might not to want to open anything anyway, namely a business, there are some places that are just plain unappealing to the ear. There are towns that for whatever reason struck ‘appeal to tourists’ off the local chamber of commerce agendas, watched the Rotarians rotate their wheels out of Dodge and whose mayors are currently in the process of decommissioning our welcome wagons. I give you the 10 worst named cities in America. Special honor to Pennsylvania for dominating this list.

    10. Dead Horse, Alaska

    What more could we say about it without invoking the phrase? If your town is a ‘one horse’ one, better make sure the beast isn’t glue factory-bound.

    9. Fleatown, Ohio

    Brought in from a curbside mattress. Don’t make any hotel reservations.

    8. Hell, Michigan

    File:NWS Hell MI.jpg

    ‘Hell’ might mean bright in German, but these name choices aren’t. If Hell was at a lower latitude, instead of Michigan, at least in the summer it would lend itself to ‘It’s hotter than Hell”, “No it isn’t” repartee.

    7. Virginville, Pennsylvania

    Image result for Virginville, Pennsylvania

    Not a popular town for the guys, but probably a place most mother’s would like their daughters to take up residence, at least until they are safely married. The fact that a hotel bears the name is high comedy. (See photo)

    6. Looneyville, Texas

    File:Map of Nacogdoches County. LOC 2012590091.jpg

    You can only blame the township so much, when the founder was name John Looney. At the time the word looney may not have had the connotation it does now. But the stigma must be horrible when you think about your job interview and announce you are from the town of Looneyville.


    5. Boogertown, North Carolina

    File:Map of Gaston County North Carolina With Municipal and Township Labels.PNG

    One good thing about Boogertown, is that it’s in Gaston County home of Cito Gaston who captained the Toronto Blue Jays to back to back World Series wins. This may be a stretch, but why don’t YOU come up with something for a substance a construction worker shoots out his left nostril.

    4. Boring, Oregon

    https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/b/b3/Boring_Oregon_Exit_Ramp_HWY_26.jpg

    The community was named for W. H. Boring, an early resident of the area. The name “Boring” is embraced by locals, however, and found in many local businesses, resulting in many road signs that seem humorous to outsiders. Boosters of the village designation use the slogan “The most exciting place to live.

    3. Blue Ball, Pennsylvania

    https://cdn10.picryl.com/photo/1990/12/31/1940-census-enumeration-district-maps-pennsylvania-lancaster-county-east-earl-673b19-1024.jpg

    The town’s name often gets attention due to it being very similar to blue balls, a sexual condition in males. This joins nearby towns Intercourse, Bird-in-Hand, and Virginville in the list of sexually-suggestive sounding town names in the Pennsylvania Dutch area of Pennsylvania.

    2. Spread Eagle, Wisconsin

    Image result for Spread Eagle, Wisconsin

    A city that’s tough on crime, but leaves you feeling compromised.

    1. Intercourse, Pennsylvania

    File:Intercourse, PA Keystone Marker 3.jpg

    The sign reads “Welcome to Intercourse” and how many married men thought the were entering that very “city” when getting married, only to find it was a one-way trip to Blue Ball Pennsylvania. Good thing its close by.

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    71 Comments

    1. Dennis on May 30, 2017 3:01 pm

      Truth or Consequences, NM

    2. Mary Jane on January 9, 2016 7:53 am

      Lynchburg, VA
      Also in the city is John Lynch bridge named after slave master that perfected how to keep people in slavery centuries later.

    3. Dale Harris on April 6, 2015 6:27 pm

      Flippin, Arkansas
      Mulehell, VA

    4. ChereeK on March 10, 2015 8:48 pm

      In NC, the ppl who live in Boogertown, NC will not use the town name. They consider it to be a racist comment. Typically, African-Americans live there. That name a long time ago was used as a deragatory comment about where lots of pplof color lived.

      • ACommentator on May 13, 2016 1:11 am

        So what do they call it? Like what people in Rowling’s Harry Potter series called Voldemort: “He-who-must-not-be-named”?

        • Rickinator on December 6, 2016 5:02 am

          What are you, a 12 year old girl.

    5. Joel on June 20, 2013 6:04 pm

      Horseheads, NY isn’t far from where I live… 😀

    6. Andrea on February 26, 2013 8:24 pm

      What about Flushing in Queens County, NY!

    7. Liv on December 30, 2012 7:52 pm

      I’m pretty sure there’s a city in Vermont called “Satan’s Kingdom”… *cue scary music*

    8. Peter Boucher on November 23, 2012 9:57 pm

      Do any residents from No. 9 own any dogs ? Does Bugs Bunny live in No. 6 ? And do 7,3,2 and 1 have any escort services ?

    9. Peter Boucher on November 23, 2012 9:22 pm

      Come to Arizona and enjoy the towns of : Surprise, Bumblebee, Show Low, Tombstone, etc.

    10. KYLE on October 15, 2012 12:46 pm

      Lol my friends dad is from Arab, Alabama. (pernounced the derogitory way)

    11. Jamyskis on October 2, 2012 7:09 am

      You might not be able to say “it’s hotter than Hell”, but given how cold Michigan can get, you can always point out Hell, MI when people say that hell is likely to freeze over first.

    12. E on September 7, 2012 10:17 pm

      Dix, IL

    13. Marvin on August 10, 2012 12:20 pm

      Here in North Carolina we have all sorts of interesting and unusual names.
      Conetoe (pronounced Co Nay Toe… It’s Indian I think)
      Lizard Lick (yeah, really!)
      Bahama (not weird, just cool!)
      Duck
      Welcome
      Whynot
      Coolemee
      Middlesex (Grin)
      Turkey
      Icard
      Welcome & we got Thankful
      Climax (should be next to Middlesex! lol)
      Gay
      We have the Bat Cave (its a little town in the mountains)
      We got some really out there names for little towns and the sort. Leave it to North Carolina! lol

    14. Brendan on July 30, 2012 7:50 pm

      What about “No Name”, CO?

    15. Jason on July 20, 2012 5:20 am

      Idiotville, OR

    16. Salukimars on July 17, 2012 11:51 am

      I grew up 15 miles from Gays, IL.

    17. Person on July 3, 2012 9:48 pm

      How about Hell-For-Certain, KY, Toad Suck, AR, or Sugar Tit, SC?

      then we get to the international towns…

      Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch, Wales
      Peniscola, Spain
      Cumbum, Indonesia
      Sexi, Peru
      Dildo, NL Canada
      the combinations are endless!

    18. a on June 5, 2012 8:56 pm

      Gaysville, VT

    19. JetShack on May 2, 2012 2:35 pm

      Hooker Oklahoma. It’s located in Beaver County.

    20. Raine on May 1, 2012 8:07 pm

      Wow! Hahah,,,,my friend is from Dildo in Newfoundland!! theres towns in saskatchewan called
      Elbow, Cereal, Eyebrow, and Fiske!! haha and im proud to be from elbow

    21. JacquelineG on April 29, 2012 11:48 am

      and i thought slap out alabama was bad

    22. Sarah on March 23, 2012 5:26 pm

      please.. I live in Cumming, Geargia..
      not to mention, there’s also a Boozeville up north and Butts county down south.. >_>

    23. Wil on March 10, 2012 7:51 pm

      I had business in a city near Atlanta called Cumming, GA. Is it any wonder the residents say the live in Forsyth County.

    24. Jim W on August 3, 2011 8:37 am

      And there is Horneytown, NC which is not far from Climax, NC.

      • Barbara on February 6, 2015 8:00 pm

        Hey Jim, don’t forget that High Point is between Horneytown and Climax. (as if it was a running narrative). Heading east past Raleigh, there is that little spit in the road called Lizard Lick. Yuck!

        I would also like to mention a couple towns in northern Arkansas. Flippin and Accident.

        And of course, lets not forget the town that named themselves after a TV game show, Truth or Consequences, New Mexico.

    25. Trevor on June 5, 2011 3:04 pm

      There’s a place called Mianus, in Connecticut…pronounced my anus. That should easily be #1

      • Denise on March 10, 2017 7:08 pm

        I agree Mianus should be at the top

    26. aplastic on June 4, 2011 6:01 am

      You left out Wanker’s Corner, OR.

    27. Sean on April 14, 2011 12:12 am

      How about Bucksnort, Tennessee?

    28. liz on March 30, 2011 4:21 am

      what about Mianus, Connecticut? On Jackass 3D, they went there.

    29. FMH on February 8, 2011 4:11 pm

      Next to my hometown there are three villages, one in the valley, one half way up the hill and one on the hilltop. They’re called “Unterhöll”, “Mitterhöll” and “Oberhöll”: Lower, Middle and Upper Hell. But Thomasgschieß (lit.: Thomas’ Shitting) next to them isn’t bad either.

    30. Maggy on December 30, 2010 4:17 pm

      Blue Ball, OH

    31. Evan H on December 20, 2010 11:53 pm

      i am proud to live in spread eagle! hahaha

    32. jasmine on October 14, 2010 2:34 pm

      i think reading, pa should be in dat list

    33. Kevin Klawitter on August 24, 2010 12:00 pm

      Nimrod, Minnesota

    34. Dale on June 6, 2010 10:00 pm

      How about

      Frenchlick, and Gnaw Bone, Indiana

    35. Brian on April 30, 2010 8:13 am

      Rabbit Hash, KY

      Big Bone Lick State Park, KY

    36. MatthewZD on March 30, 2010 6:51 pm

      I can't believe that Cumming, Georgia, didn't make the list.

      • Matthew on September 19, 2012 2:50 am

        I know! I’m there right now! I couldn’t believe it when I moved here

    37. Dustin on March 28, 2010 6:40 pm

      What about Moorehead, North Dakota?

      • Bill on November 8, 2010 2:59 pm

        Moorhead is in Minnesota….FYI

    38. Dani on February 5, 2010 9:58 am

      There is a Dykesville, WI!

    39. cannonski on January 31, 2010 8:31 am

      I'm reminded of the town of Dildo in Canada, which even has "Dildo Days" whatever they may be!

      "Located in Upper Trinity South, Dildo is a very historic place for Newfoundland tourism. Dildo was settled in the early 1800's by Reids, Prettys, and Smiths. During the 1990's, these names were still predominant names in the community. Every summer Dildo sponsors Dildo Days which is a community celebration and a Newfoundland tourism destination."

    40. Mark on November 26, 2009 8:08 pm

      There is also a town called Two Dot in Montana.

    41. jezzie on October 12, 2009 6:34 am

      here in australia there places called stringybark, broke, and even big long words i cant pronouce. but overall this list is good!

    42. ozwald on July 28, 2009 3:02 pm

      What about Beaver Crossing Nebraska??? it was listed in Playboy

    43. thangthangling on April 17, 2009 4:08 pm

      How about the cites Beaver Dam ky and Beaver Dam Wis

    44. katie on March 16, 2009 6:11 pm

      Haha. i'm actually from boring, oregon! and it really isn't as boring as it sounds! 🙂

    45. Kayley on March 6, 2009 3:13 pm

      Wisconson got number 2! Yea!

    46. Ben on February 20, 2009 11:51 am

      Not to be dirty, but where im from in Nebraska, there is Beaver City, and Beaver Crossing

    47. j.b. on December 8, 2008 7:19 am

      Kickapoo (there are few of them)

      Mianus

    48. Char on November 26, 2008 12:26 pm

      I love my state.

      Don't forget Hicksville, Pennsylvania.

      • Andrea on February 26, 2013 8:14 pm

        There is a Hicksville in New York also!

    49. Dan on November 17, 2008 8:53 pm

      Pennsylvania has a few other honorable mentions:

      – Slippery Rock

      – Muddy Creek

      – Weedville

      – Mars

      – Big Beaver

      – Dubois (pronounced "Do-Boys")

    50. Obvious on November 1, 2008 7:15 am

      What about Lynchburg, Virginia?

      • Beckie on August 17, 2011 6:52 pm

        The city of Lynchburg got its name from it’s founder, John Lynch, who at 17 established a ferry across the James river which opened the way for commerce and growth of the area. It has absolutely nothing to do with lynchings!!! By the way…it’s a great city nestled in the foothills of the Blue Ridge Mountains…world renowned sites, exciting outdoor recreation and more…check us out at http://www.discoverlynchburg.org and come for a visit.

    51. Brian on September 22, 2008 5:56 am

      What about Climax, MI?

    52. Shelly on September 13, 2008 3:50 pm

      There is also a place called "Empty, Georgia" and "Needmore, Georgia". Not to mention some interesting cities that have spanish names… "Punta Gorda, Florida" translation: Punta is Spanish for "point" or in some spanish dialects the profane word "bit**"…"Gorda" is the feminine form of the adjective meaning "fat". Then there is "Los Banos, California" and Los Banos means "the restroom" in Spanish. So if you ever see any hispanic people snickering about something we say…you know why! They may consider Americans to be rather strange considering our choice in names for our cities! haha 🙂

      • Hector on August 3, 2011 11:25 am

        Punta means “point/tip” in all forms of spanish, the curse for “b***h” that you’re thinking of is actually spelled “puneta”

      • Mel on September 21, 2012 9:53 am

        Ok, both of you are incorrect about the word “punta”. “Punta,” in every Spanish-speaking country is “point.”

        The word “puneta” is vulgar, but it does not mean “b**ch.” The word for b**ch is “puta”, without the “n”.

        Please, if you don’t know Spanish very well, don’t try to define or describe Spanish words without first doing your research.

        • TheRealMel on February 12, 2015 6:47 pm

          simmer down, mel

        • TheRealMel on February 12, 2015 6:48 pm

          simmer down, mel. you are getting all sorts of worked up.

        • Loida Cotto on May 5, 2017 9:25 pm

          Great, you arr oartly correct. Punta can mean point. It has variois translations…stitch as in sew. Puñeta in some hispanic cultures is vulgar. However in other hispanic/latino cultures puñeta is the cuff of a man’s shirt. Thus the vulgar act can get involved. In addition, you are 100% correct in stating to others, if you don’t know, do not make it fact.

    53. bob blathers on September 9, 2008 12:14 pm

      Um..Virginville is good, but nearby where I live in Southern Utah is a small town just simply called "Virgin" which is right next to the "Virgin River" which is ironic because both the town and the river are the two dirtiest places in the county.

    54. galen on September 6, 2008 10:14 pm

      Haha way to go pennsylvania to make it on the list three times! Good research into the names who ever made this list. I've been to intercourse pennsylvania, it's a big amish town, and they play up the intercourse name like you wouldn't believe. I bought a shirt that says I heart Intercourse….Pa.

      • Shailee on October 29, 2012 5:18 pm

        Lol..I Heart Intercourse. That’s awesome.

    55. heather on September 2, 2008 3:18 pm

      brilliant list, I thought it was hilarious 🙂

    56. Tanya Bennett on September 2, 2008 11:31 am

      Oh that made me giggle out loud, I wish I had written that list!

      • Deb on May 6, 2017 7:09 pm

        How about French Lick, Indiana

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