One of the great things about globalization is that no matter where you go, you can always find a piece of familiar Americana there to protect your senses from all the foreign devilry going on around you. Nowhere has it ever been more evident than with fast food joints. Today McDonald’s restaurants can be found in the deepest, darkest corners of the planet, making sure American tourists never open themselves to new tastes and experiences. Or rather, you hope that it’d be the case. Sadly, nowadays McD’s have forgotten their proud roots and embraced new cuisines and cultures driven by ridiculous things such as market penetration, common sense and profits. This produced a bunch of unfamiliar, international McMenu items like:
10. The KiwiBurger
From: New Zealand
McDonald’s introduced the KiwiBurger in New Zealand back in 1991 and since then the sandwich has been the Futurama of fast food. No, not because it was a really well made sandwich with a large, loyal fanbase, but because it kept getting cancelled. It was slated for a final cancellation in 2009, but what really became of it is anyone’s guess, as you can still allegedly find a couple of places that carry it.
And why not, just check out what goes inside it: beef, tomato, lettuce, onions (off to a great start), beetroot (gha?), egg
9. The McLobster
From: parts of Canada, New England
Admittedly I am cheating a little because you can get the McLobster in the US, but I think we can all agree that New England hardly counts as part of the United States (it even has “England” in the title!)
The McLobster, as 3 months of tiresome research on my part have shown, is a lobster sandwich. Its primary ingredients are lobster and bread. The sandwich has actually been around for a couple of years and at one time there were even plans to introduce it to restaurants nationwide. But then the cook at McDonald’s HQ ran out and someone realized that it would impossible to convince Middle American landlocked states that their “lobster” isn’t actually 2 weeks old or really made from ground up homeless guys.
8. McRice Burger
From: Taiwan, Singapore, Indonesia, Philippines etc.
In another example of how McDonald’s international menu items are clearly thought up by 10 year olds, here’s the Asian rice burger. No, it’s not rice between two pieces of bread. That would be silly. It’s rice formed into buns with beef or chicken between them, which makes a lot more sense. You know how people are always complaining that you can’t eat rice with your hands.
This sandwich is actually quite popular in Taiwan and just like the McLobster there have been plans to maybe make it a permanent McMenu item. But that will of course never happen. If you can convince an American to eat rice without beans in it then CALL THE COPS because he’s clearly a communist spy!
7. McSwarama
From: Israel
You know, there’s lots of talk about pain and suffering going on around the world, but the one tragedy that is often neglected is how some folks can’t enjoy a good ol’ slab of fried beef with bread due to, say, religious reasons.
It is with such people in mind that McDonald’s has invented the McShawarma for the Israeli market. It’s one of the country’s kosher menu items, and consists of turkey shawarma in pita bread. But isn’t it still basically meat in a type of bread? Well, yes, but the main difference here is that the meat is barbecued, not fried, without any of that sweet, heart-molesting McDonald’s fat. In other words: a sham and an abomination.
6. Spam & Eggs
From: Hawaii
The only real reason why I am not a corporate executive is because I cannot think like one. Where I see McDonald’s as an unhealthy fast food burger joint, an executive sees it as an unhealthy fast food joint PERIOD. Once you have that down, all sorts of opportunities for new heart-attacky menu items open up. Enter the Spam & Eggs set from Hawaiian McDonald’s.
In 2002, 78 restaurants in Hawaii started to test out dinner sets consisting of rice, spam and eggs. Though Spam might very well have a case in mainland US to soon be recognized as a synonym of “pig lips and anus” it’s actually quite popular in Hawaii, so it probably doesn’t seem all that weird to them. Still, we’re talking about the place where guys used to wear grass skirts, so take that for whatever it’s worth.
5. The Mega Teriyaki Burger
From: Japan
The typical American’s love affair with teriyaki sauce borders on the erotic, so it’s hard to see why McDonald’s Teriyaki Burgers aren’t sold all over the states. They’re however all the rage in Japan, where the sauce originated. But one day the Japanese looked at their puny teriyaki-drenched burgers and said to themselves: “No… this will not suffice.”
And that’s how we got the Mega Teriyaki. Essentially a Big Mac swimming in the sweet, dark, teriyaki sauce and mayo, it’s the only known sandwich in existence which comes with a side order of fries, nuggets or a prefilled Last Will and Testament. OK, that’s obviously not true, but it should be.
4. The McCurry Pan
From: India
McDonald’s is the world’s largest buyer of beef. In India the cow is considered holy. You’d think that the two would be about as compatible as a sack of toddlers and a barrel full of battery acid, but dammit people, there are profits to be made and gold-filled swimming pools to be bought! Say hello to the McCurry Pan.
The McCurry Pan is an original, surprisingly complex McCreation made especially for the Indian market. It’s a crispy bread box of sorts (as in, a box made out of bread) filled with a creamy sauce of mushrooms, broccoli and bell peppers (there also exists a chicken version). Not only does it look awesome, it also actually consists of real vegetables, while back in the US it took months of negotiations before all of us begrudgingly accepted onions and lettuce in our fast food. I actually kinda feel bad for mocking the McCurry Pan and would really like to try it…
3. McLaks
From: Norway
Norway = Norwegian Salmon = Salmon Burger
Bam! I think I am getting a hang of this whole McDonald’s marketing mentality.
All the way back in 1997, which was 14 freaking years ago people (Gosh, we’re old) McDonald’s introduced the salmon sandwich in Norway to some initial success. Unlike their regular fish sandwich, the McLaks was meant to be more regional, healthier and lower on fat, meaning that there actually used to be a large Norwegian demographic which went looking for healthy foods at McDonald’s. But they got what was coming to them when the sandwich was discontinued after giving a whole bunch of people food poisoning. I still can’t decide whether that is hilarious or just a little funny.
2. Gallo Pinto
From: Costa Rica
Not everything has the honor to be called your national dish. Every food item with a claim to such a title has to be rooted deeply in the history and culture of the country it comes from, capturing its essence inside one, tasty, edible package which should be treated with the respect it deserves. Then there’s Gallo Pinto, Costa Rica’s national dish which you can get at their local McDonald’s.
The dish itself is very simple. Basically, it’s fried rice and beans, eaten primarily for breakfast. The McD version is also served with scrambled eggs and sour cream. Man, who said that national heritage cannot be streamlined, packaged and distributed by a multinational conglomerate? Actually it was me, but what I really said is that it “shouldn’t be.”
1. McWedding
From: Hong Kong
Yeah, noticed how this article wasn’t titled the Top 10 Foreign McDonald’s Sandwiches? Hell, even if it was, I would still totally mention this thing because… No, seriously, McDonald’s offers weddings in Hong Kong! What the what? Oh Boy, I know what this is, I died and went to Hack Comedian Heaven where easy targets like this actually exist. Dammit, I bet I died on the toilet too…
Anyway, yeah, McWeddings.
Two things that we have to make clear are that McDonald’s restaurants have a generally better image in Asia than in the West and that weddings there are also insanely expensive. Put two and two together and you end up with the McWedding instead of four (that’s the magic power of Asian math, which is better than white people math). The wedding receptions offered by McDonald’s take place in one of their restaurants as the couple and their guests feast on burgers, fries and shakes. Stacks of apple pie act as the cake. No, really.
61 Comments
In Australia they bring out the McOz regularly, which is very similar to the kiwi burger. Beetroot is awesome on burgers, wish places in the US would offer it, burgers just don’t taste right without beetroot (and preferably bacon, and BBQ sauce, yum).
hi there japan hong kong and halo unverse macdondalds haveing weddings
At where I grew up we can havd kids birthday parties at playland. Hawaii’s teriyaki burger is so good. I love spam and eggs for breakfast too. The author is so insulting towards the people in Hawaii. Only because she doesn’t eat spam she doesn’t have to insult all the people who do. Everyone I have met in the mainland act so disgusted by spam (I mean everyone!) but yet every time spam goes on sale, the shelves are empty…..some ghosts must be buying them, I guess?!
Shell Harris is a he. Minor detail.
Not to my wife. 😉
Actually, this article was written by Rick Raule, I just posted it, as the site’s owner. I’ll correct this now though.
The McRice burger came out in the Philippines in 2006. They had 2 variations: chicken and beef. My favorite was the chicken it was served inbetween 2 rice made buns sprinkled with black sesame seeds, had chopped purple cabbage and had a sweetish but tangy mayo dressing. It came out for a limited time till the second quarter of that year. Too bad it was phased out, it was really something McDonald produced that had high quality. As for the other products here, it would be interesting to try them even once McDonalds in the Philippines seems to have cut costs with their ingredients today. A fillet o fish sandwich is a mere size of 3-4 bites with a very thin fish patty. Their mcnuggets is coated now with so much flour so much so that when it gets cold, it gets tough and chewy. If they want to keep the costs low, don’t let the quality suffer because that’s exactly what their doing.
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Actually, McPinto isn’t the official way of make Gallo Pinto. In Costa Rica there are plenty of ways of make it, McPinto is just one more ,but its taste is very spicey unlike the rest of them. Personally i don’t like it.
In the Middle East they serve the McArabia, with grilled chicken patties on flatbread dressed with garlic mayo sauce. Never had it, personally, but it’s a favorite of the older, more traditional generations!
http://segersc.files.wordpress.com/2008/10/mcarabia.jpg
spaghetti is common on filipino fast-food menus, including, i believe, at McDs.
“McDs” as a name, otoh, is not! they call it McDo’s there….
Here in Honduras sells, fried Chicken, and Baleadas 😀
the japanese in the photo says “sister [burger] to the megamac!”
so what’s the megamac in the first place? it’s not a local name for the big mac (some countries do that) — japan uses “big mac” (biggu makku) same as the west. is there yet a SECOND locally-tweaked big mac? teriyaki vs…WHAT?
best thing they had in japan was the TSUKIMI burger, btw. wish THAT would make it to US menus….
incidentally, article is wrong in stating that americans love teriyaki. they’ve tried out the (single) teriyaki burger a couple of times here, and it didn’t sell too well outside of hawaii.
i can’t blame McDs for not offering a mega version when the basic one pretty much flopped. personally, tho, i do wish it were here.
I really really really really want the Mega Teriyaki Burger.
*drools*
Wow, amazing to show how retarded with education you are to post that New England is not part of America. Do you know your history at all, or anything about New England? _Fn moron! you have got to be the dumbest person ive ever come across. You keep being you, im sure youll go far………
there isn’t?
i’m in NH and i’ve never seen a branch that DOESN’T carry it! but it is seasonal – june through aug or so. i thought memorial day was the trigger, but as of yesterday, my local branches haven’t started yet. maybe july 4th is the magic date.
Oh, i’m from Connecticut. It must be found farther north than CT.
i’m pretty sure it’s in RI as well. maybe it’s more of an “along the coastline” thing than a north-south thing?
CT is along the coast…..
my bad. u are indeed.
in any case, i bet u have it there somewhere. maybe not your branch but hunt around.
my point about “the coast” was not to restrict the number of NE states; I actually meant that it’s available in coastal states OUTSIDE new england. didn’t someone report seeing it in baltimore?
prolly just wherever they think “fish” sells….
Well, i did live in the middle of nowhere, CT, so that might be why
I am extremely offended by this. I live in New England, and my ancestors came over on the mayflower. If it was’nt for them, there could be no such thing as America, and actually, there’s no McLObster in most New England locations.
wow, snob much?
the author isn’t listing oddities of foreign countries or even of their food; he is listing oddities of the offerings in an AMERICAN CHAIN adapting thereto.
i find him neither provincial nor narrow-minded.
physician, heal thyself.
Lists like this always make me sad because they seem like exercises in displaying the author’s provincial attitudes and narrow-mindedness.
i think spam & eggs in HI is less startling to visitors than SAIMIN (nissin ramen, basically) on the menu.
we also had mcsushi briefly (late 80s?), but it didn’t catch on. saimin still going strong, tho…..
oh, and btw, they have a teriyaki burger in the US every couple of years. comes and goes, like the mcrib. initially called the “samurai burger” on the mainland, but i guess they decided that was too corny (or racist, or something) — it was back to “teriyaki burger” the last time around.
still, it is not a “mega”….
btw, most UNIQUE entry really should be “Smile…¥0” on jthe menuboards in japan!! right under the apple pie….
“while back in the US it took months of negotiations before all of us begrudgingly accepted onions and lettuce in our fast food.”
How’s that again? I don’t know of anyone who has ever balked at either. In fact, every one I know wouldn’t dream of a hamburger without onions! Where did you ever form such an opinion?
Well this is certainly an entertaining thread. Everything from McAngus to McZealand, including McPolitics (note, in Blue states, law requires eating it with the left hand only; though isn’t “staunch” what you do to stem blood flowing from gaping wounds?). Given the food poisoning thing in Norway, perhaps it wouldn’t be too far-fetched to call it the McExLax. To the person who is scared witless now because they saw “Super-Size Me” … that fauxumentary ranks up there in truth value with “Al Gore invented the Internet” (something to keep in mind with Al Gore being a big proponent of global warming … maybe if he shut up, glaciers would return). As for the Kiwis … great people, silly bird. And to wrap it all up … McDonald’s in Germany … cardiac calories washed down with great beer (or bier as they spell it, but they’re foreigners, what do they know? And Italian beer? You were joking, right? I mean talk about marketing possibilities … McCow mit McBrau!
Wow. that was quite a McRant. Are you on some kind of meds we should know about?
Rant? If you couldn’t tell it was tongue-in-cheek humor, maybe it’s you that should be concerned with your own meds.
Can someone from Japan please send me a Mega Teriyaki?
Why would you write that “New England hardly counts as part of the US”? The United States began in New England. If anything, New England represents best the founding principles of the nation. The south not so much. I don’t understand why Lincoln didn’t let them go.
You know nothing of the South or it’s people. For all your smugness, you just lumped millions of people into a category and maintained that they were “ignorant” because of their geographical birthplace. And you think of yourself as so educated and open-minded. You should be ashamed.
The War’s over. Can the south just get over it?
no apostrophe in “it’s” there.
a new englander would have known that. 😉
How did beer (Italy) not end up on the list?
Can somebody please explain why I would actually like to try a Mega Teriyaki?
We dont have rice burgers here in the Philippines, what we do have is the Spam and Eggs. McLaks looks yummy!
Mine too!
The RICE does not exist anymore in the phippines.
It didn’t at all! It never was served in philippines..
Actually, New England is the first part of this country continuously settled. So your statement about McLobster is unfounded. My family has been in this country since 1621, and we settled here in New England. Not giving you s**t but get the facts straight.
My family too. New England could maybe be considered CULTURALLY seperate, but is definetly part of this country.
I live in Hawaii, I eat spam, eggs, portoguese sausage eggs and rice is really good. I didn’t know that they don’t serve it on the mainland…
I used to pretty much only eat the spam platter when I worked at McDonald’s lol it’s a good thing mainlanders don’t like it, more for us! I know a lot of guys on Maui who still wear skirts, but I doubt if this author came face to face with them he wouldn’t be cracking jokes about it. I’m surprised he didn’t mention the maharajah mac or the potato katsu burger.
they still sell the kiwi burger in here new zealand O_o
it was never cancelled, its one of those burgers that comes out once a year for a limited time.
also, its called the kiwi burger because we are kiwis… so no offensive in the slightest
so yeah… kinda wrong dude lol
And this year, for the Rugby World Cup, they introduced the “Angus Kiwi Burger” using “high end” Angus beef in a more “deluxe” bun etc. i preferred the original, but have it without the beetroot.
In a lot of “mom and pop” burger joints, a burger comes standard with beetroot here in NZ, add an egg and it’s an egg burger! McDonalds made it their local “special” and some places will make it on request even when it’s not on the menu.
A number of years ago, a Japanese visitor to work bought one and was disappointed! He was expecting it to be made from Kiwi meat!
Note there are three meanings to Kiwi.
1. The flightless bird (the original meaning)
2. People from New Zealand (because the bird is only found here)
3. An abbreviation for Kiwifruit (bred in New Zealand and originally called Chinese Gooseberrys).
It always confuses me that a lot of people think a kiwi is the fruit!
What worries me is that foreigners think we call ourselves Kiwis after the export fruit… Now that is slightly offensive to my national sensitivites >.<
And the article writer is trashing beetroot! The Kiwi Burger is an awesome combination of ingredients. Man, these Americans need to get out more, see the world, experience and taste things outside their borders.
Being named after the bird is any better?
Well, the bird is unique to the country and the people are anything but flightless!
Famous kiwis are all around the world!
I think so 😉 Besides I like our native birdlife. Gives me an excuse to go hiking in the bush.
You know, some of these items on this McMenu list don’t sound too bad, others, blech! The #1 on the list surprised me, I mean we used to make jokes about having wedding receptions at Wal Mart, but apparently, in Japan, wedding receptions at McDonald’s are quite common. Who knew? Different cultures, different customs. Interesting list.
Hong Kong isn’t in Japan brah
Oops, forgot my geography lessons. At least I know that Libya is in Africa, unlike Michelle Bachmann. Thanks for the geography reminder.
Michelle Bachmann. The woman who wished Elvis Presley a Happy Birthday on the anniversary of the day he died. What rock did that GOP, tea party fanatic crawl from under (Yes, as you can read, I am a staunch Democrat)
@ Peter Boucher Yea Peter, I am a staunch Democrat also, I’m liberal, but in a common sense way. I don’t go overboard like some the ‘nanny state’ laws have. I fully intend on voting for our current President for re-election. I mean the guy inherited one heck of a mess. The GOP has no viable candidates at the current time, but that’s only my opinion. That’s what’s called a ‘Democracy’. That’s why it’s important to get out and VOTE! It’s a privilege and a duty of every American citizen.
People in New Zealand do refer to themselves as “kiwis.” It makes sense for a burger exclusively sold in New Zealand to be called a “Kiwi Burger.”
Also, we call ourselves Kiwis after our national icon, a rare flightless bird (the Kiwi).
In NZ, we call the fruit a “Kiwifruit.”
There is always someone to beat me to my comments…you are that someone this time.
hawaii is part of the US, so not foreign.
Not the greatest list, and pretty offensive to other countries as well.
..and it’s a myth that cows are holy in india. they are forbidden to Hindus to eat as they give milk
I remember when I was vacationing in France and was walking down the famous street the Champs S’Elysees. There just happened to be a McDonald’s there. I walked in and the menu was no different than ours with only one exception. And being the French custom, this McDonald’s served WINE !! God’s honest truth. I did get both a laugh and ordered a cup of wine with my Big Mac……
The Documentary “Super – Size Me” still to this day has me both freaked out and thinking twice about eating at one