Top 10 Aptly-Named Shots And Cocktails

Google+ Pinterest LinkedIn Tumblr +

Ever since man first realized alcohol could be made better-tasting (and looking) when mixed with other alcohol, he has constantly tried to top himself.  Today, there are thousands of different recipes; here are the top ten that live up to the name they have been given.

10.  The American Flag

american-flag

How To Make:

1 part grenadine

1 part white cream de Cacao

1 part blue curacao

Layered, for AMERICA!

Layering is an essential skill for shot making, and what better way to celebrate a new-found skill than with a big ol’ shot of America.  The only reason it doesn’t score higher is simply because making it wrong may accidentally convince people that you’re French.  Which is kind of the opposite of what you’re going for.

9.  The Zombie

the-zombie

How To Make:

1 part white rum

1 part dark rum

1 part golden rum

1 part pineapple/papaya juice

1 part brandy (fruit flavoured if possible)

Splash of lime

Mix above, then top with high proof rum.

Optional Bonus: can be lit on fire.

The Zombie, bluntly put, will have most drinkers moving like the shambling remnants of death it’s named after before they even finish it.  Its incredibly high alcoholic content is hidden by the smooth, easy-to-overlook flavor of various tropical fruits.  Its true recipe remains a mystery, as its inventor was renowned for altering the way it was made to avoid copycat mixologists stealing his business.

Still, the version above is a drink that seems slow and harmless but, if you let it sneak up on you, it’ll get to your brain quicker than an army of Romero’s most tenacious undead shamblers.

8.  Battery Acid

battery-acid

How To Make:

2 shots of everclear

3 shots of blackcurrant juice, cordial

Mix, pray.

Optional Bonus: can also be lit on fire!

Since everclear is also known as the most alcoholic alcohol in the world, it’s only right that any drink containing it is given a name that is utterly repellent.  Some would say that, since the drink only contains one kind of alcohol, it’s not a true cocktail; most others say if you put another shot of alcohol into this thing, you’re pretty much committing manslaughter.

7.  White Russian

white-russian

How To Make:

1 part vodka

1 part Kahula (or coffee liqueur alternative)

1 part cream or milk

Stirred and served over ice.

One of the older cocktails on this list.  A White Russian is only considered Russian due to its high vodka content; however, if any drink ever represented the bitter sting of Russian winter, mixed with the beauty of its landscape, it’s this one.

The odd juxtaposition of cream and vodka, coupled with the harshness of the ice, and finally topped with a coffee liqueur kick is enough to make most drinkers believe this cocktail is straight from the loins of a genuine comrade, or at least someone who drank a lot of alcoholic potato juice.

6.  Jagernuke

jagernuke

How To Make:

1 shot of red bull

1 glass of jagermeister

Drop the shot of red bull into the glass, drink before fizzing stops.

The jagerbomb is a night club classic.  Thousands are sold every single day, so then it was only a matter of time until someone thought, “what would happen if we reversed the polarity?”

The answer is the Jagernuke. A drink that’s so underground, it’s has no clear definition.  Just like a nuke though, it’s completely over-the-top and has no real reason to exist, except for severe displays of bravado or idiocy.

5.  HADOUKEN!

hadouken

How To Make:

1 part blue Curacao

1 part blueberry vodka

Splash of high proof spirit

Mix and set alight; shouting HADOOOOOUUUUUKEN is a necessity, not a choice.

When prepared properly, this should be essentially the drinking representation of the move use by Ryu himself in the Street Fighter games: a burst of blue flame that causes a small amount of damage to your body.

The only difference here is that throwing one of these things at an opponent will probably end the fight immediately while they desperately claw at the shot-sized hole you just left in their face.

4.  AK47

ak-47

How To Make:

1 part vodka

1 part brandy

1 part whiskey

1 part gin

1 part rum

1 part bourbon

1 part cointreau

Splash of lime

Top with soda water.

With a list of ingredients looking more than a shopping list that anything else, the AK47 more than lives up to the name of the legendary assault rifle.

Known for being able to be cobbled together at the last minute by total amateurs and outlasting entire freaking wars, the AK47 is capable of stopping any man in his tracks.  The cocktail is no different; the instructions for making it are actually shorter than the list of things contained in it, and it contains enough alcohol to punch anyone in the throat if it’s not sufficiently watered down.  It may not be the fanciest item on the list, but it’s one that gets the job done.

3.  Baby Guinness

baby-guinness

How To Make:

2 parts Kahula (or similar coffee liqueur)

Top with baileys (similar Irish cream liqueur)

This shot, when prepared correctly, should look almost exactly the same as the famous Irish drink from which it takes its name.  Almost universally reserved for St. Patrick’s Day, this drink has all of the qualities of its namesake: mainly that it’s only drunk one day a year, and no one really enjoys it.

Especially the day after.

2.  Jackass

jack-ass

How To Make:

1 part Jack Daniels

1 part high proof rum (the higher the better)

Pour into a shot glass, drink.

Jackass is a word almost universally synonymous with doing something incredibly stupid, say for example leaping from a roof while holding a giant green ball.  If the entire Jackass crew were put into shot form, it’s almost guaranteed that it would be just like this concoction: highly alcoholic, flammable and hard to stomach.

It also lives up to the other meaning of its name by kicking the drinker like a mule and leaving them braying like an ass immediately after consumption.

1.  Gin and Tonic

gin-and-tonic

How To Make:

You know what?  No.  We don’t need to describe how to make this.  The gin and tonic is perhaps the world’s most efficient cocktail.  You’re actively telling the barman how to make it as you’re ordering it.

If it wasn’t for the fact a lime or lemon wedge is customary, this entire entry could have been 3 words long.  Combined with the fact that this drink doesn’t even have a defined alcohol-to-mixer ratio is a testament to how simple and ubiquitous this drink is.

Written By Karl Smallwood


Share.

8 Comments

  1. A shot a friend and I invented, The River Styx:

    1 Part Jim Beam ‘Devil’s Cut’ 90 Proof
    1 Part Knob Creek 120 Proof

  2. if you’re american and come north of the border you have to try a Caesar, way better than a bloody mary, just dont ask whats in the mix haha

  3. Peter Boucher on

    And just remember Ladies and Gentleman. If you are mixing a drink that calls for Jagarmeister and you don’t have any ? Just use Ny-Quil. It tastes the same and almost equal in alcohol quantity. Personally, There is not enough money that you could give me to put that rot gut into my mouth and bloodstream.

  4. Isn’t the jagernuke made from a glass of Red Bull and a shot of Jägermeister? You’d have to be pretty bold, and have an extra liver to dring a full glass of Jägermeister,as suggested above.

Leave A Reply