Top 10 Celebrity Ladies That Men Should Avoid

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In business, there is a risk vs. reward model that states that the bigger the risk, the bigger the payout, or inversely, the bigger the bust. But sometimes, the risk is so great, the payout is either unattainable or not worth the investment. With that being said, this is the list of the Top 10 attractive single ladies for men to avoid, because no matter how gorgeous the subject, there is a steep price that goes with that beauty.

10. Miranda Cosgrove

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Cosgrove was the lead actress in the cable series iCarly. If you’ve never heard of her, then you are far too old for her anyhow. In 2012, the Guinness Book of World Records recorded her as the highest paid child actress on television. Now 19, she is walking away from her own hit television series. Because the network is Nickelodeon, details of the show ending are guarded, but it’s safe to say that if all of your co-stars are getting their own series, but you’re leaving the network, you can guess where the problems lie. Good luck recreating that success. (And if she’s leaving to pursue her ‘music career,’ run, because she’s crazy, too.)

9. Britney Spears

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It seems like a lot of men connected with the naughty schoolgirl theme when Spears sang “…Baby One More Time” in 1999. The visual was too powerful to overcome, but if you actually close your eyes and listen to the singing you realize that ‘hey, Christina Aguilara can really belt out a song, this girl is just eye candy.’ Then overproduced and overmodulated singles followed confirming what your ears had told you in the first place. Then Britney shaved her own head in a fit of rage and there was a new perception of the young lady. Public relations damage control has been in full effect ever since and today you can find her as one of the judges on Simon Cowell’s X Factor. I am confident that Britney has enough money that the Spears’ handlers would make you disappear if you interfered with their makeover.

8. Anna Kournikova

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One of the most popular tennis players in history, despite never having won a tournament in singles. As a popular Russian athlete at the turn of the millennium, she snared the most talented Russian hockey players in the NHL, Sergei Federov, and then demanded that he keep their marriage a secret as to keep her popularity high. Since their divorce, she has been linked to celebrity after celebrity, but refuses to comment on her personal life. She just wants you to buy or download anything that has her picture on it, and there are a lot of products and a lot of websites that can accommodate you. ESPN named her the most overrated athlete in history in their series “Who’s #1?”

7. Kelly Osbourne

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One of the panelists on the E! show Fashion Police, Kelly was more likable when she was the punky little daughter on the Osbourne’s reality TV show. She has tried almost all aspects of show business, but hasn’t quite found her niche. Now, after thousands of dollars worth of professional work on her body, and her image, and her presentation, she’s out on the market. Can you image all of the problems under that plastic, made for TV ornament?

6. Pam Anderson

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A generation ago, Pam Anderson was the number one reason teenage boys across America watched Baywatch. Then there were the sex tapes, the Playboy appearances, the movies, the guest television appearances, the guest radio appearances, she has appeared on almost every format conceivable in media. Not only that, she’s been tabloid fodder for decades. Anderson’s been married, not married, separated, not separated, linked to various musicians, not linked to various musicians. Even the plastic surgeries seem to have not slowed her popularity. Sadly, it is the serious subject of Hepatitis C that lands her on this list.

5. Megan Fox

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Here’s the problem with Fox, her occupation is listed as actress. Almost every movie she’s in, she is nominated for a worst actress Razzie award. At the same time, she is always on the cover of practically every men’s magazine and is listed near the top of their hottest women lists. Fox ‘moves the needle,’ which makes her a hot commodity in the entertainment business. She is also in a number of upcoming movie productions, but has been dogged by controversy in movies she’s already been in. At this point, it’s hard to discern what are rumors and what are publicity stories. Same goes for her personal life, with rumors of mental illness that are more numerous than entries in her filmography.

4. Carrie Underwood and/or Taylor Swift

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Neither one of these musical artists show any reason for being on this list. They both seem like fairly normal, pretty, talented young ladies. There’s the problem in a nutshell. Once some lothario shatters their hearts, your jerkiness is enshrined in history. Both seem to have the musical ability to write a catchy hook and make the rest of the world hate you too if you cross them. Don’t believe me? Ask Warren Beatty if he’s glad he dated Carly Simon.

3. Rihanna

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What’s not to love about Rihanna? Her songs are catchy, there’s edginess, there’s her doing duets, and of course the hilarious SNL skits. What’s not to like is the seemingly ever present Chris Brown factor. For as long as he’s alive, he’s probably in the picture, hiding in the bushes, watching from binoculars, or even secretly holed up in the floor boards. This makes even going near Rihanna a very dangerous proposition.

2. Hope Solo

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Hope Solo is unequivocally good looking. But when she was a young goalkeeper for the U.S. Ladies Soccer team, she slandered Briana Scurry, who was a better, more established player than her. Then Solo went on Dancing with the Stars, writing a book saying her dance coach abused her (which he denies.) In the same book she claims her goalkeeper coach abused her (which he denies.) As a matter of fact, she seems to like the attention, whether it is good or bad. I find it very hard to believe that someone with the competitive fire of Solo would allow all these men to bully her. Do yourself a favor and get to know the U.S. Soccer field players and pass on the goalkeeper.

1. Kim Kardashian

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Would you date a porn actress? That’s the basic premise of the Kardashian argument. Known primarily for a well circulated sex tape, Kim Kardashian later became the driving star behind the hit E! reality show Keeping Up with the Kardashian’s. The show revealed Kim’s exploits as many men watched in horror as she basically turned NBA journeyman Chris Humphries inside out during their 72 day marriage. Who could forget his befuddled, deer-in-the-headlights look in episode, episode…well, in almost every episode? Becoming a national punch line on a reality show is enough to dissuade almost any man from dating the most beautiful women.


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19 Comments

  1. Carrie Underwood has been married to Mike Fisher a player in the NHL since 2010. I have not once heard a peep about anything amiss in their marriage either.

  2. Keith Watabayashi on

    I’m a waiter in Hollywood and I have had the absolute pleasure of waiting on Kelly Osbourne (and her mom), Carrie Underwood and Megan Fox. They were all very nice, polite, patient and generous tippers. Megan Fox is very shy, Carrie Underwood has excellent taste in wine and Kelly Osbourne is outgoing and awesome, although I will say her entourage of friends sometimes show up without her and they all suck.

    I thought this list would be funny and offer some researched anecdotes. I can say, from direct experience, to stay away from Angie Harmon; crazy coked out psycho with moronic baked husband. Nice people. But they party too hard for your average bear…

    • @ Keith. You being a waiter, how about this for a scenario to wait on at the same table. Courtney Love and Bjork. That would be a challenge straight out of hell. I used to work as a stagehand and toured the Northeast part of the United States. I worked for 3 1/2 years at that job and then hung it up. The worst two were Mariah Carey (that should speak for itself) and believe it or not, Tori Amos had a bit of a mean streak in her. Much to my surprise, one of the nicest ladies I had the opportunity to meet was Cher. Very polite and ladylike and she Thanked me for my compliments to her. However, she was heavily guarded by her entourage of bodyguards but they seemed to trust me.

  3. Very, Very serious omission…………….SNOOKI !!! And another one that comes to my mind (and this is for the older folks), Jennifer O’Neill (“Movie : Summer Of ’42”). At the age of just 44 she had divorced her 7th husband. Where’s Liz Taylor when you need her !!! And though she’s at the point of being mummified, Zsa Zsa Gabor (Her sister Eva, now she was an elegant and beautiful woman).

  4. all these women are damaged goods. i wouldn’t touch them with a 10 ft poll. i believe classy is utterly sexy. these women have none. some men like pigs.

    • 10ft “poll”? Do You mean “pole” or are you referring to some kinda .. ehm… electional poll vaulting? Besides, do you even think you would GET as close as 10ft to any of these women without security kicking your butt? “Damaged goods”? Yeah, right.

  5. 10 Speculation that she might have something to do with the end of her show? Not exactly great reasoning

    9 didnt shave her head in a fit of rage…clearly you didnt watch the video. she was laughing the whole time.

    8 She isnt overrated…nobody claims that shes a great tennis player. She is just hot.

    7 More speculation

    6 A bunch of stuff about her past that isnt relevant to your reasoning. Then you just discrimate against her for having a disease. (good one)

    5 Speculation and discrimation against having a disease (good one)

    4 neither carrie underwood nor taylor swift is carly simon

    3 I’ll give you that one only because I hate her

    2 more speculation that she is lying

    1 Because her ex husband has a stupid look on his face?

    • @ Brian. I love that list as its concise, astute on your part and some of them are funny. I do have one question though on Anna Kournakova, though she never won a tournament or coming not even close to a singles Grand Slam Tournament, didn’t she win some big titles in playing in the doubles format of the game ? Just curious. Again, a very observant list that you have posted.

      • Yes, Anna Kournikova has won at least Australian Grand Slam doubles in 1999 and 2002 with Martina Hingis as her partner.

    • OK, I’ll do this one by one, too, since you did:

      10. I would do her, now that she’s not a minor any more.
      9. She was laughing while she was shaving her head? Well, I would still do her if her hair has grown back. But I would keep a kitchen knife under my pillow, just to be safe.
      8. No, I wouldn’t touch her, just out of respect for Sergey Fedorov (a hockey legend).
      7. Oh, I would absolutely do her! She’s Ozzy’s daughter! Ozzy is a legend, but too demented by now to come after me for ravishing his daughter! 🙂
      6. Oh, I would definitely do Pamela, but with a rubber. Hepatitis C … bad, mmkay?
      5. Hmm, not sure if I’d do her. Can she act s*ex?
      4. OK, I didn’t get this one.
      3. I HATE THAT B… person! “Catchy” songs? I would say annoying.
      2. Too skinny and muscly for a lady. I wouldn’t have abused her, had I been her coach.
      1. Well… who cares? Come to Daddy, Kim! 😀

      • The article states that you should avoid dating carrie underwood because carly simon wrote songs about her ex. didnt make sense to me either. Hep C is not a sexually tranmitted disease

        • Oh wait… Hep C isn’t a sexually transmitted disease? Where’s Pam’s e-mail address?!?!???

        • It says nothing about the reason being Carly Simon it brings her up as an example. Have you heard any of their songs I’d like to bring up We are never getting back together and Before He Cheats now imagine your name being added to these songs and sung to women all over the world and wonder if you would still like to be with them.

  6. The great and legendary comedienne Mae West said it best, “I think marriage is a great institution, but I don’t think that I am ready for an institution yet !”. She lived to be 87 and never got married. Look her up, that woman was no dummy !!

  7. Men can’t resist???? They are all very resistable..Kardashian is an annoying pain in the butt, as is Osborne. Can’t stand any of the women.

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