The British Way to Respond to Massive Injury, With Henry Paget

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The Brits are a famously stoic and reserved people, they’re the kind of guys you could stab and receive a complaint about it via mail. This fact was never proven more then when, 1st Marquess of Anglesey, Henry Paget got his leg blown off in the battle of Waterloo.

With a title like in front of his name it probably won’t surprise you that Paget was a gentlemen of the highest regard, what will surprise you though is that even in the face of a mortal injury he maintained his composure so hard he was the first person in history to suffer from rigormortis before he died. As noted above, during the battle of Waterloo Paget was lost his leg when he was struck by grapeshot. A wound we expect he didn’t notice right away since he probably dismissed most heavy metal objects between his legs as his own set of cast iron balls.

For most people such an injury would cause a scream so high pitched it could shatter a mirror’s eardrums. Paget however, upon looking down to see a bloody stump where his second favourite leg used to be, calmly stated to the nearest officer, who just so happened to be the The Duke of God-damn Wellington, “By God, Sir, I’ve lost my leg“. The Iron Duke, suitably unimpressed, turned around and answered “By God, Sir, so you have!”.


Pictured: Henry Paget and the first Google image result for the phrase "Stone pimp".

Pictured: Henry Paget and the first Google image result for the phrase “Stone pimp”.

So yeah, years before Chuck Norris was even an itch in his father’s nutsack, there was a British guy who reacted to having his leg blown off like he’d just stubbed his toe. And they have the cheek to put the Queen on money. We’re sorry, but if anyone sums up being British it’s the guy who was so polite losing his leg wasn’t a good enough reason to intrupt someone.

Source.


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1 Comment

  1. Karl, this is why I love reading your articles, stuff like this, “A wound we expect he didn’t notice right away since he probably dismissed most heavy metal objects between his legs as his own set of cast iron balls.”

    If I had been drinking milk it would have shot right out of my nose. Brilliant, as you English chaps say.