Top 10 Biggest Jerks in the World Today

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While discussing the issue of horrible people with stupid faces it’s important to not give into emotions and start comparing everyone to Hitler.  The people on this list are, in a word, scum, but legally their crimes barely register on the Outrage-O-Meter.  However, in strictly moral terms, everyone on this list has sunk to lows which you’d need a state-of-the-art military submarine to reach.

Now, TopTenz cannot legally advise that you track down the following folks and continuously poop in their cereal every morning because the logistics of such an endeavor would be just impossible.  But, if you ever run into them, be sure to give a stern look and a judgmental wag of the finger to:

10.  Paul Christoforo

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Back in 2011, a gamer named Dave ordered two of those newfangled thingamajig PS3 Avenger controllers.  Unfortunately, the shipment of the controllers kept getting postponed until Dave decided to contact Ocean Marketing, who were handling customer service and PR for the Avenger. That’s when Dave reached Paul Christoforo, aka His Majesty, The King of the Internet and the Greater Duke of Gaming.

After a few e-mail exchanges things started to escalate between Paul and Dave until the former went, in proper psychological terms, bat-crap loony banana.  Paul quickly started insulting Dave for daring to ask when he will get the stuff he paid for, telling him to shut up and stopping very short of adding “or else” at the end.  After Dave informed Paul that their e-mails were sent to major gaming websites like Kotaku, IGN and Penny Arcade, Paul simply laughed that he’s like so tight with the people there that it won’t matter none.  When Mike Krahulik, aka Gabe from Penny Arcade, kindly told Paul that due to his behavior he will never get a booth at PA’s PAX festival, Paul actually told him that he will get the mayor of Boston to force Mike into giving him that booth.  This is basically the equivalent of trying to get into your neighbor’s birthday party by threatening to complain to his mother.  Also, the neighbor here is 40 years old.

In the end Paul did get what was coming to him when every single person and company he name-dropped either denied ever knowing him or confirmed that he’s a jackass.  But, you might be asking, why single out Paul?  Yeah, he’s a horrible person, but it’s not like there aren’t worse customer service reps out there.  Well, it’s actually about the Avenger controller.  It just feels so wrong for one horrible person to bring so much bad press to an invention which was originally designed by a teacher to help a disabled student.

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9. John Fitzgerald Page

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JFP entered the internet lime light in 2007 when his Match.com e-mail exchange went viral.  In it, John replies to a woman who, obviously during a very tragic period in her life, wanted to know more about him.  His opening line is about how totally rich he is.  Then he goes on to explain, without actually being asked to do so, that he attended the world famous University of Pennsylvania and has a physique of a Greek god.  This naturally sounded exactly like asking a guy for the time and having him respond “Why yes, I DID bang Angelina Jolie.”

So after the woman politely rejected John, he answered back to tell her that she just missed the chance to be with, in no uncertain terms, the greatest man in the world.  That’s certainly douchebagery at its finest, but it feels like there should be more for Johnny to make this list.  There sure is!  In 2010, it came to light that, along with being a Mensa member and the greatest living actor of all time, JFP also runs a modeling agency!  Only not really.  Apparently what Johnny did was copy-paste ads from real casting calls and sent them to his clients, for which he demanded money.  When one woman decided to expose his scam in a mass e-mail John immediately contacted her and told her that he knows Nick Nolte!  And that if she doesn’t apologize or give him $1,000, he will sue her!  Then he threatened to use his contacts to put the girl on a no-fly list because he can totally do that, you know.

Luckily the woman, only known as Rebecca, didn’t buy it and even found a lawyer willing to represent her pro bono.  In the end John never sued her, for reasons which are known only to a complicated mind like his.

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8. Matthew Chidgey

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When a woman named Keara was treated rudely at GASP, a clothing store in Australia, she fired off an e-mail to the store’s manager hoping to get, at the very least, an apology for being called a joke by the store’s employee.  Matthew, the manager, had a different idea.

Following the established MO for huge asses, Mattie started off with a few well positioned name drops like Kim Kardashian, Selena Gomez and Katy Perry, explaining that their store is more catered to those kinds of people, not Keara, who probably smells (it was heavily implied).  He unfortunately omitted the part where that makes it OK to insult people in your store, but let’s move on.  The manager then proceeded to defend his employee, Chris, calling him a superstar and kindly asking Keara to please not compare herself to GASP just because she too works in retail.  See, it doesn’t count unless you sell swatches of polyester to sort-of-famous people.  That’s just common sense.

All in all Chidgey’s attitude sounds about the same as feeling superior to the “common folks” because you once treated the anal glands of the Taco Bell Chihuahua.

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7. Abraham Kortotki

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After Nicole Rowe, 40, was diagnosed with breast cancer she decided to not take it sitting down and went off to kick cancer’s butt with poker!  Let me explain.  In 2009 Rowe was preparing for the Atlantic City women-only poker tournament where she was sure she will come first and earn enough money to keep her afloat after her cancer surgery.  A surgery where they would cut off her breast.  A noble cause if there ever was one.

Unfortunately, Rowe’s plans came to a small hitch when she only placed second at the tournament.  It happens.  But the problem is with to whom she lost: Abraham Kortotki, a man who elbowed his way into the women-only tournament and won the first prize of over $20K.  It turns out that it’s actually illegal to deny anyone entry to sport tournaments based on gender, race or sexuality, which is how Kortotki got in.  When Rowe explained her situation to him and asked if, in these circumstances, he would maybe want to share his winnings with her, he refused.

The final judgment is of course left to you.  Is Kortotki a greedy, slimy poker pro with less right to breathe the air we all share than a diseased weasel, or just your run of the mill jerk?  Let us know in the comments section.

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6. Dog Wheelchair Thief

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It takes a very specific type of person to steal from the disabled.  It takes an even more specific person to steal from animals.  And it takes the most specific person in the world to steal from disabled animals.  The anonymous thief in this story is exactly that type of “specific,” which is actually a code word for “horrible.”

Dave Feeney’s dog Lucky, a 12-year-old Belgian Shepherd, got hit by a car some time ago and lost the use of his hind legs.  Since then, he could only move with the help of a dog wheelchair.  But one night, Dave left the wheelchair in his front yard, only to discover the next day that it was stolen.  Let me repeat that: someone stole a custom dog wheelchair for a disabled dog.  Was it an act of desperation to finance that person’s out-of-control habit of eating all the d***s in the world?  I’m not saying yes but yes, that’s totally the reason why he did it.

In a bit of good news, some nice people over at HandicappedPets.com have since donated a new wheelchair for Lucky.

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5. Xiao Baiyou

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Xiao Baiyou, aka “Wolf Dad,” is a horrible person and parent.  In his book, originally actually titled “Beat Them Into Peking University,” he lays out what is most likely a taunt for God Almighty to finally end his life by admitting to the following things: he regularly beats his kids, sets up literally thousands of rules for how they are supposed to act, including how to HOLD STUFF, and actually considers himself to be a great dad.  Unsurprisingly, his face looks like the result of millions of years of evolution working hard to produce the most punchable object in the universe.

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4. John M. Fiala

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Let’s get this out of the way:  Rev. Fiala is a pedophile priest.  But as horribly depressing as that makes me feel, priests molesting kids isn’t really all that uncommon, so what makes Fiala eligible for this list?  One simple detail: After his victim accused Fiala of sexual abuse, he put a hit on the kid’s head.

I’m freaking serious.

Fortunately, he offered the $5,000 for the boy’s life to an undercover agent with the Texas Department of Public Safety and is now currently comfortable behind bars, with no further harm coming to his victim.  Unfortunately, you know that Fiala is destined to strike it rich after he sells the movie rights to his thoroughly messed up story and the resulting film makes millions because, if you look at his face, it’s obvious he will be played Bryan Cranston.

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3. Darren Pease

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We’ve already established that you’d need to be a particular brand of horrible to steal a handicapped dog’s wheelchair.  But then, what does that make Darren Pease, who stole over 300 THOUSAND pounds from a trust fund of a quadruple amputee 5 year old girl…who also happens to be his niece?  If you’ve answered “Oh GOD, what the hell is wrong with the world?!” then you were correct.

The story is simple: Darren Pease “Of Crap” is a banker and part-time Pillsbury Doughboy lookalike who was made a trustee of his niece’s charity fund, which she was counting on for small stuff like, oh, replacement limbs and living.  Pease was trusted with managing this small fortune due to his experience in finances and because he was family.  But in 2008 it was discovered that he had plundered all but roughly 200 pounds of the original cash, which mostly came from donations.

Police say that they are looking into what Pease did with the money, a statement which I sincerely hope means that they are planning to tie him to a chair and work on his face with a cricket bat for a couple of nights.

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2. Hamza Abuhamdeh

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Oh look, another story about stealing from an unfortunate little girl related to you!  Just as TopTenz’ secret slogan says, “You will grow to hate the human race!”

Sabreen Haq was just 14 when she died of a brain tumor but here, death was made all the more sad when she didn’t get her dying wish to finally have her own room in a real house.  What’s worse, she almost saw her dream come true, when her local community came together and raised $120,000 for her. But then they entrusted the money to Sabreen’s cousin Hamza, who bought a house and immediately rented it to other people, leaving Sabreen to die in her tiny apartment.

When confronted about his crimes, which come down to three counts of theft, Hamza chewed his gum, smirked and replied that the wishes of a dying kid don’t mean much to him because, hey, “we’re all gonna die.”  He’s, of course, totally right, especially after I find both the cheapest flight to Cleveland and a way to attach an angry badger to a sharpened hockey stick.

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1. HIV Guy

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Look, I get it.  HIV sucks.  But no matter how bad or alone you feel with it, I advise, no beg you, not to do what this anonymous New Zealand man did and infect your sleeping wife with the virus just so that your misery can have company.

OK fine, that’s not the whole story.  The guy who did this also missed having sex with his wife, after he contracted the virus by… I’m going to say “rolling in medical waste for fun.”  Yeah, that sounds like the kind of stupid, senseless thing this guy would do.  Unfortunately, his sick plan worked halfway.  After pricking his wife with a needle soaked in his infected blood, the man succeeded in giving his wife HIV.  He will even finally get his wish and have lots and lots of sex, though mostly of the “rape-y” variety as he will most likely and hopefully spend the rest of his miserable life in prison.

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Written By Rick Raule


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59 Comments

    • I agree with Amrendra–This list will get a lot of comments.–But I also wonder why many people don’t believe there’s a hell.

      • So… the need for a hell means there is one? Should I go check my garage for a new car, because I totally need one, which by your logic means my new car actually exists because there is a need for it. Maybe I can get $10K in my bank account the same way!
        I agree that a lot of people diserve to go to hell. That DOESN’T mean hell EXISTS!

        • Garages,bank accounts,blah,blah–All that doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist either,my friend.

        • When you have proof for hell, or anything else in the several hundred existing mutually contradictory world religions, just go ahead and publish it. Otherwise, it belongs in the Fiction section next to other mythology like Niflheim and the Elysium Fields. You (Denis) are the one making claims that your fantasy world exists, so you are responsible for backing up your claims. That’s how reality works.

        • I go on faith–No,I don’t have a you-tube video of Jesus dying for me, but then again you don’t have a video tape of a one-celled amoeba crawling out of a slime hole to start evolving into man either. I don’t really care what you believe but you astheist certainly get your panties in a wad over Christians. I mean,really,what do you care? You can pray to Rosie O’Donnell for all I care. To each his own. Good luck..

        • Garages don’t exist, Dennis.

          Neither does the Atlantic Ocean.

          Sure, you can come up with all this ‘evidence’ about the Atlantic if you like, but at the end of the day people are going to all have their own theories about Oceanography anyway.

          This is how stupid you sound.

        • Gonzo–Your comments make no sense at all but what else can anyone expect from someone with the brains of a dead slug?

        • And attacking Dennis only proves there are still more than enough assholes out there. Damn, the Human Race is pathetic.

  1. Stealing a disabled dog’s wheelchair…that is just unthinkable and pathetic. Karma is a bitch and it will one day get back to him…

  2. God these people are lowlifes. That thing with the Dog made me livid. The start of the article mentions Hitler. Despite being a deranged megalomaniac he loved Dogs. Even he wouldn`t do something like that.

    • This is what your comment sounds like to me: “Sure, Hitler killed millions of people, including the handicapped, but no way would he steal a wheelchair from a dog – no way, nope, that’s too low even for him.”
      I do not understand how the wheelchair being taken from the dog, of all the horrible and irreversible things that were done on this list, is the one that got a rise out of you.

      Despite my condescending tone, I am genuinely curious about this. Would you mind helping me to understand why this one in particular made you mad?

  3. I find it sad and nonsensical that of all of the horrible things that these jerks did, the one that gets the most emotional reactions is the wheel-chair being taken from the dog.

    There are entries on this list about dying girls being stolen from by the their family members, and a dying wish being denied when it was fully capable of being fullfilled; a man bragging about beating his children, and coming up with thousands of rules that can’t possibly be followed; a priest that put a hit out on a child that he molested; a man injecting his wife with HIV, for Pete’s sake, and the majority of the outrage goes towards the jerk that stole a wheel-chair that got replaced. The dog got a replacement wheelchair, but several of the actions of these jerks can’t be undone. The dying wish of the girl in entry #2 can’t be granted now because she’s not here anymore, and nobody that expressed anger about what these people did is “livid” about what was denied her.

    The fact that entry #6 of this list got the most emotional response is, to me, outrageous.

    • Trek Girl is absolutely right! I couldn’t have put it any better. Well said. On a lighter note, # 7 really made me chuckle in complete bewilderment. Now here’s a guy who just doesn’t care. And it shows in his picture. The only thing that would have made that picture more amusing is if Cigar Guy was in the background. I mean look at that s***-eating grin! They all seem to have one now that I look back. Except shiny mannequin guy.

      • Thank you very much. I am glad someone agrees. I looked back at all of the pictures after reading your comment, and you’re right, almost all of them do have that same sh**-eating grin!

    • I agree. Not to say it was not sad but it was rectified. The slime balls that stole money from dieing kids or injecting you WIFE with hiv are just evil personified. I hope they get whats coming to them. And i hope its in the form of an angry viewer with a crowbar.

      • “Because people are often jerks. Dogs rarely are.”

        The child whose dying wish was denied, and the community who tried to make her wish come true whose donated money was misappropriated; the wife who did nothing but have the audacity to NOT have HIV; the child who was molested, brave enough to tell someone about it, and was then marked for death by the molester; the children who were beaten by their father and made to follow rules that cannot possibly be followed, all so that they could get into University: how were they jerks?
        These children and the woman didn’t anything to deserve what was done to them. The dog didn’t do anything to deserve getting his wheelchair stolen from him. If these people didn’t do anything to get what was done to them, and the dog didn’t do anything either, but the wheelchair was replaced, and what was done to the children and woman can’t be undone, how is it logical for the dog to get more sympathy and outrage expressed on his behalf than the children and woman? I just don’t think it is.
        I see what you are saying when you say “Because people are often jerks. Dogs rarely are”, but, boy, is that shameful – to have more pity for a dog who was made whole, than for people who either can’t or won’t fully be made whole, all because “people” are jerks.

        I sincerely hope that if you ever need sympathy or outrage expressed on your behalf, people will not fail to give it to you just because “people are often jerks”.

  4. I’m just going to comment on number 7. Why would you risk your money gambling in a poker tourament if you need it so badly and then cry when you lose? I feel bad that she has cancer, but does that mean she has to be awarded for losing? So if she goes to the casino does she have to win every time because she needs the money for cancer?

    I know theres an issue about sex. Women are always crying about equal rights. But clearly they have more rights then men these days.

    • Regarding the last sentence of your comment: women do not have more rights than men. It may seem like it, but in reality women are at a disadvantage in many areas. Pay equality, advancement in the work place, treatment in the work place, areas of healthcare, politics, and the military are just some of the arenas in which women do not have more rights, or the same amount of rights, as men. These matters are talked about or brought up a lot, and that might give the impression that women have more rights, but the truth is that it gets talked about a lot because there is so much left to do to get women on an equal or nearly equal footing as men.

      • Thank you,

        Not only do women still have significantly less rights in many areas, there are many American politicians actively trying to take away rights that we do have.

        I don’t agree that the man has to share his winnings, but lets stick to reality, not making up garbage so men can pretend they’re are being victimized when it clearly isn’t the case.

      • Those things have nothing to do with rights. How can you legally make someone have the same treatment in the work place?

        Women always get the children in divorces and most of the money and house…ect. Those kind of legal rights

        • Everything I listed has to do with rights. Laws have been made to make employers treat workers fairly, whether they are female, a minority, handicapped, or religious, and employers face serious penalties if they don’t. There are rules about what you can consider when firing some, what constitutes sexual harassment, whether you can fire pregnant women because they are pregnant (you can’t), what kind of conditions are unacceptable for people to work in, and many other things.

          I understand that women are favored in matters of divorce and child custody, but having the advantage in a few court matters does not mean that women aren’t at a disadvantage across the board. One of the best and easiest examples I can come up with for women not being on equal ground, or even nearly equal ground, in matters where gender shouldn’t matter, is the fact that women get payed less than their male counterparts for doing equal work at the same job.

          I am sure that I am not doing the best job at explaining my stance, but I encourage you to find out more about civil rights and women’s rights. Not only is it interesting, it could help you learn about your own rights and help you recognize when your employers aren’t treating you or your fellow employees right, or aren’t providing you with what they are supposed to.

        • the only reason women are not on “equal footing” as men in the work place . has to do with the choices women make. i.e. they take more time off work for family, they change jobs more frequently, they work less hours . when all factors are entered into teh equation, the wage gap tends to disappear .

        • Trek Girl: Sadly, entitled men never seem to grok the whole gender inequality thing. There always seems to be a lot of man-splaining and protestations of how they’re the real victims.

          Yeah, cry me a river.

  5. there is a recent story of a Zimbabwean maid who laced a child’s porridge with her menstrual blood and she was HIV positive. now that one sick and disturbing. should be no 1

  6. This should be the top ten people you genuinely wish would die in the most horrible and painful way imaginable. These are just wastes of human flesh. Its nice to see the internet used for good like giving some of these pieces of trash what they deserve.

  7. I would give an honorary mention to the B****ches from a group: A group of American Queen-Bees who bullied a young Irish girl to the point where she committed suicide, and then proceeded to make snarky remarks about her online after her death. I can only fathom that the judge dismissed all charges brought upon them with the hope that, out in the real world, those c***s will be slapped or spit at daily by total strangers for the rest of their lives, no matter how long they may be.

    • Oh, I remember that. That was absolutely horrible and disgusting. Yes, those young women could easily be on this list.

      • IIRC, there were two or three boys arrested in connection with Phoebe Prince’s suicide, too, not just the girls.

  8. John Fitzgerald Page is still going at it, looking for women on dating sites. I had the displeasure of hearing from himi on Plenty of Fish almost a year ago, and found out all about him when I googled his email address. He’s also on OkCupid. On both sites he uses the name “IvyLeagueGrad”. It’s pretty funny actually. Glad I had the sense to block him immediately after everything I found out, and I’m sure everyone else he tries to talk to does as well.

  9. I’m sorry, but am I the ONLY one pissed off that Tucker Max was nowhere to be found on this list???? I only clicked on the link so I could read his entry!

  10. John M. Fiala should be ranked 1st or at the very least 2nd in this list. Honestly was literally sick to my stomach after reading the last entries on this top 10.

  11. God, I hate people.
    Some of these outraged me more than others, but regardless, they are all miserable people.
    The Scorpio in me in going ape-**** right now. I’ve given you the less vengeful version.
    It’s sad that there are Buddhists in Tibet who light themselves on fire for a peaceful protest to make room for these scum bags.
    I love the writer for this article, though.

  12. What the heck is number 7 doing on the list with these other lowlifes. He entered a poker tournament, won, and then refused to give his winnings up someone else. Those are the only pertinent facts. Everything else is inconsequential. So what if he was the only guy in the tournament. The people operating the tournament shouldn’t have been discriminating in the first place. It is irrelevant that the woman had a very good reason for wanting the prize money. It is not our place to judge how people spend their winnings and categorize them as good or bad. I think it is interesting that she didn’t even ask to simply borrow money, which would have at least been more reasonable. She pretty much expected that she should get the prize money regardless of whether or not she won. Talk about entitlement!

    Let’s face it, if your cancer treatment plan involves winning a poker tournament you are either an idiot, or the protagonist in a bad movie.

    • You tell them, Jeremy! By the way, I’ll be cheering you on as you go for the gold at the Special Olympics. Or if not there, I’ll catch you at the 4th Grade Spelling Bee. Hope you win!

    • I have to agree here. What if another woman had won the tournament, or she had gotten out on the first round? None of this would have ever been posted. The hating of other genders needs to come to a screeching halt.

  13. Wow, these are certainly some pretty good examples of how NOT to behave. What a bunch of selfish, self-centered freakazoids to state the very least!!

  14. Too bad there isn’t a law putting away these type of low-lives. After three strikes at being assholes they lose all rights in being even remotely seen as human and are sent far, far away.

    Can I put my slumlord landlord (who is a greedy old medical doctor) on this list? He sure fits the profile.

  15. Why is Kortotki on this list? He won the money she did not. You cannot force someone to give all their winnings to charity. The only problem i can see is that he won the ladies only tournament but given that female athletes are dying to be allowed to compete against men and everytime they do they equal the amateurs of male athletics it really isn’t worth the time.

  16. The fact that this is a list and the criminals on this list have been arrested calls into question what the “hate the human race” is for. Millions of people in the world have depression, it doesn’t even come close to balancing out. Millions of people have had terrible childhoods and as such have weak morals. It is perfectly reasonable to expect some odd things to happen and to be so puzzled by this makes you a complete imbecile.

  17. This guy writes like a sir. Rick Raule should be writing for Cracked and earning the big bikkies (yes, I’m from Australia). Well played.

  18. chrispusattucks on

    Odd that people complicit or down right responsible for the deaths and misery of millions don’t make the list. Why is that? Bashar al-Assad, anyone?

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