Top 10 Worst Named Cities in America
At the risk of never being given the keys to the city of Crapo, Maryland, where you might not to want to open anything anyway, namely a business, there are some places that are just plain unappealing to the ear. There are towns that for whatever reason struck ‘appeal to tourists’ off the local chamber of commerce agendas, watched the Rotarians rotate their wheels out of Dodge and whose mayors are currently in the process of decommissioning our welcome wagons. I give you the 10 worst named cities in America. Special honor to Pennsylvania for dominating this list.
10. Dead Horse, Alaska
What more could we say about it without invoking the phrase? If your town is a ‘one horse’ one, better make sure the beast isn’t glue factory-bound.
9. Fleatown, Ohio
Brought in from a curbside mattress. Don’t make any hotel reservations.
8. Hell, Michigan
‘Hell’ might mean bright in German, but these name choices aren’t. If Hell was at a lower latitude, instead of Michigan, at least in the summer it would lend itself to ‘It’s hotter than Hell”, “No it isn’t” repartee.
7. Virginville, Pennsylvania
Not a popular town for the guys, but probably a place most mother’s would like their daughters to take up residence, at least until they are safely married. The fact that a hotel bears the name is high comedy. (See photo)
6. Looneyville, Texas
You can only blame the township so much, when the founder was name John Looney. At the time the word looney may not have had the connotation it does now. But the stigma must be horrible when you think about your job interview and announce you are from the town of Looneyville.
5. Boogertown, North Carolina
One good thing about Boogertown, is that it’s in Gaston County home of Cito Gaston who captained the Toronto Blue Jays to back to back World Series wins. This may be a stretch, but why don’t YOU come up with something for a substance a construction worker shoots out his left nostril.
4. Boring, Oregon
The community was named for W. H. Boring, an early resident of the area. The name “Boring” is embraced by locals, however, and found in many local businesses, resulting in many road signs that seem humorous to outsiders. Boosters of the village designation use the slogan “The most exciting place to live.
3. Blue Ball, Pennsylvania
The town’s name often gets attention due to it being very similar to blue balls, a sexual condition in males. This joins nearby towns Intercourse, Bird-in-Hand, and Virginville in the list of sexually-suggestive sounding town names in the Pennsylvania Dutch area of Pennsylvania.
2. Spread Eagle, Wisconsin
A city that’s tough on crime, but leaves you feeling compromised.
1. Intercourse, Pennsylvania
The sign reads “Welcome to Intercourse” and how many married men thought the were entering that very “city” when getting married only to find it was a one-way trip to Blue Ball Pennsylvania. Good thing its close by.
Thanks to the Shark Guys for portions of this list.
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8 Responses to “Top 10 Worst Named Cities in America”
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Oh that made me giggle out loud, I wish I had written that list!
brilliant list, I thought it was hilarious
Haha way to go pennsylvania to make it on the list three times! Good research into the names who ever made this list. I’ve been to intercourse pennsylvania, it’s a big amish town, and they play up the intercourse name like you wouldn’t believe. I bought a shirt that says I heart Intercourse….Pa.
Um..Virginville is good, but nearby where I live in Southern Utah is a small town just simply called “Virgin” which is right next to the “Virgin River” which is ironic because both the town and the river are the two dirtiest places in the county.
There is also a place called “Empty, Georgia” and “Needmore, Georgia”. Not to mention some interesting cities that have spanish names… “Punta Gorda, Florida” translation: Punta is Spanish for “point” or in some spanish dialects the profane word “bit**”…”Gorda” is the feminine form of the adjective meaning “fat”. Then there is “Los Banos, California” and Los Banos means “the restroom” in Spanish. So if you ever see any hispanic people snickering about something we say…you know why! They may consider Americans to be rather strange considering our choice in names for our cities! haha
What about Climax, MI?
What about Lynchburg, Virginia?
Pennsylvania has a few other honorable mentions:
- Slippery Rock
- Muddy Creek
- Weedville
- Mars
- Big Beaver
- Dubois (pronounced “Do-Boys”)