Author: Jason Iannone

Top 10 Things to Know About Jason Iannone 10. He was an editor at TopTenz, makin' sure everythin' on this here site reads pretty gud-like. 9. He has been featured on Cracked.com on several occasions, each time with traffic exceeding a million views. 8. He occasionally referees for independent wrestling shows, most notably Inter-Species Wrestling. 7. If he ever meets George Clooney, he's definitely getting his eight bucks back for Batman and Robin. 6. His favorite list of his is Top 10 SNL Characters Who Deserved Their Very Own Lame Movie.. 5. His favorite list from somebody else is Top 10 Awkward Bible Stories. 4. He's ginger, but still has a soul. A filthy, polluted soul, but a soul nevertheless. 3. He can play guitar well enough to not make ears bleed, but not well enough to impress any talent scouts. 2. He is 0-for-3 in Presidential elections, probably because he keeps voting for third-party nobodies who don't ever get on TV. Gonna be 0-for-4 come November 2012, probably 1. He loves stand-up comedy, even though there's almost no way he could ever do it himself.

When corporations trot out a mascot to help sell their product, they usually aim for light, fluffy, and friendly. That way nobody gets upset, nobody writes angry mails, and everybody keeps paying out the nose. Some companies want to look cool and badass though, in the hopes of attracting those who want only the edgiest,…

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The good citizens of Sequelsville welcome its newest member: Pixar!  The success of the Toy Story sequels, along with Cars 2 because God hates us all, has apparently made Pixar as sequel-happy as anybody else.  Monsters Inc. 2, a prequel to the original hit, is slated for next year.  Sure glad they’re tying up all…

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All this week, we at TopTenz will be celebrating the publication of 1,000 articles, with a series of articles centered around the number 1,000.  Along with letting The Count from Sesame Street act out his ultimate wet dream, the 1000-themed week will showcase many great articles, this one most of all.  Modesty is for weenies.…

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OK, that’s enough; the jokes are over.  For too long, my brethren and I have sat idly by, while you and your stupid little buddies mock us.  “Gingers. BAH,” you spit with disgust.  “They have no souls.  They can’t walk in the daytime.  They’ll steal people’s children in the night.  They’re like pale Pokemon: gotta…

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If the 90’s and early 00’s taught us anything, it’s that anything that’s normally totally bogus and square can be turned awesome and tubular simply by making it EXTREEEEEEEEEEME.  There were (and still are) a lot of extreme variations on mundane everyday crap, such as TV shows, food, sports, and everyday household items. But how…

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Nothing turns an otherwise educated and logical human being into a drooling moron faster than a lottery ticket.  The recent Mega Millions jackpot, which reached $640,000,000 before finally being hit, featured 1:179,000,000 odds of winning, which did not stop everybody in the universe from scrambling to buy as many tickets as possible because HEY YA…

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Chances are, your favorite team has a fairly silly logo.  The vast majority of them are cartoonish in nature, but at least the ones today look good.  Computer animation, slick artwork, and fine-tuned quality control churn out logos that may be geared toward children, but at least look good on that ridiculously overpriced Official Team…

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Let’s face it, nobody cares what YOU have to say.  Even if it’s the most profound, life-affirming statement ever, the fact that it comes from you and your anonymous little mouth renders it meaningless to all but your closest friends and maybe your Mom (if you’ve been calling her lately, that is). In cases like…

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Everybody needs a hobby, even famous people.  After all, they can’t just do the one thing that earns them millions upon millions of dollars, day on and day out, without some variety to keep their lives interesting.  Some celebrities have turned their hobbies into legitimately respectable second careers. Key word: some.  Other times, they take…

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Advocates of civil disobedience believe it’s OK to disobey an unjust law.  And everybody disobeys those silly small-town laws that prohibit things like training lions to ride unicycles on Sunday.  This is OK, because what else are you gonna do on a Sunday?  Read? Then there are laws and rules, on the books basically everywhere,…

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We all love a good list; it’s a quick, easy, and convenient way to organize information without starting every other paragraph with “Oh, and ALSO…” But they need to be interesting, especially in this age of endless information bombarding you from all directions, plus a few more that haven’t been discovered yet. With thousands of…

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